Let me tell you something that you did NOT do in our household while growing up. Ask, “why?”…….Mainly for one reason, we already knew the answer, “Because, I told you so!” Whether what they were telling us to do made sense or not did not matter because it was what we were told to do. I am practicing that same method of parenting with my children now…. Don’t ask me any questions, do what I say, I’m the mama, you’re the child etc.. It’s fair to say that this way of discipline has been passed down from generation to generation, raising children who never questioned authority but rather did what they were told or snuck behind their parent’s back and did what they wanted to do anyway.

There were a few times when I managed to sneak a few things past my parents (I hope they aren’t reading this….) but for the most part… anytime I did something that they told me not to do I found out the hard way why they didn’t want me to do it. I find myself now trying to instill values in my children that will allow them to listen to a warning, before they are introduced to destruction. It’s difficult knowing that in spite of my effort they may eventually ignore my warning, do what they choose and suffer the consequences.

I was well into my teens when one of my childhood friends experienced the death of his father passing. I realized how blessed I am to be able to have someone who is here to correct me. Sure they weren’t always telling me what I wanted to hear but, at least they were talking. They didn’t just let me do what I wanted to do, when I wanted to do it. They cared whom I was talking to, what time I would be home, whether or not my homework was done, if I was sad, or angry…. They certainly didn’t mind correcting me when I was out of line. The punishment wasn’t always great, whether a long drawn out lecture or poster full of chores, the discipline was always there.

I wanted to believe that once I reached a certain age I would no longer have to answer to anyone. My decisions would be mine and mine alone. But when I gave my life to God fully, I learned quickly that my parents were only “foster parents”, preparing me for when God would step in and be the sole authority in my life. I realized when I made certain decisions I was no longer grounded, made to do chores, or sit down for a lecture….The talks turned into “hmmms” “okay” and “what do you think?”…. I didn’t notice that their role had switched, I no longer faced them when receiving punishment, but rather bowed before God seeking His grace.

You should not be afraid when man stop’s correcting you…it’s natural…be afraid when God stops correcting you. When God disciplines you, just like your parent’s, he’s sending you a message. Letting you know that He has placed too much stock in you to see you give yourself away. God isn’t disciplining you because he gets pleasure from seeing you struggle or seeing you in grief. He’s disciplining you so that you learn a lesson so thoroughly, that you never have to experience it again. Be careful when complaining about His correction, questioning His ways. Job 5:17:18 says, “Blessed is the man whom God corrects; so do not despise the discipline of the Almighty. For he wounds, but he also binds up; he injures, but his hands also heal. (Job 5:17-18).”

He may have broken you, punished you so hard that you feel abandoned, even alone but do not despise the discipline. The same God who created the ocean, formed land, hung birds in the sky, and formed woman out of man can create a storm and end it all in a moment. Be careful when complaining about the storms of your life…too much of anything, even sunshine dries out the land. Just as Earth could not survive with just sun and no rain, you need both good days and bad days, so that you can survive life.

Dirt would turn to dust if the rain didn’t hold it together, that storm you’re in now is touching the dry places of your life and holding it together. Do not despise the bad days, the days when God is disciplining you. Sure we can murmur maybe even complain but be sure to never “curse God” ask him to remove His hand off of your life.

My sister and I are close in age, so close that when one of us got in trouble so did the other one. Initially this upset me but it has taught me a valuable lesson. Be careful with whom you are tied to, when God disciplines them His wrath will also touch you. That’s why we have a responsibility to be selective about who we interact with. You’re making a decision to not just celebrate together you’re also deciding to be in the storm with someone, disciplined with someone.

God I thank You for my “foster parents”…Blessing me with people who loved me enough to teach me the beauty in discipline, the need to not always do what I want, when I want. Thank You for never taking Your hands off of me, allowing my complaints to halt Your discipline. I’m grateful for this storm, even though I’m scared, even though the thunder is loud, and the wind is harsh….thank You for the rain that is reaching the deepest areas of my soul….I know that when the sun comes out I will be firmer, stronger than before. We often thank You for Your healing hand but not for Your chastisement. I’m thankful for Your faithfulness and grace-filled discipline.

About The Author

Sarah Jakes

Sarah Jakes oversees the women's ministry at The Potter's House of Dallas, the church led by her parents, Bishop T.D. Jakes and Mrs. Serita Jakes. She regularly blogs at sarahjakes.com and occasionally serves as a TV host on The Potter's Touch.

23 Responses

  1. vestaroberts

    This really blessed me….God I’m thankful for both your love and corrections!! Thanks for posting this. Once again, another AWESOME Blog! Praise God

    Reply
  2. akajam

    Beautiful Sarah! It remind me of being a young disobedient girl and my mother would often quote, “Your day is coming, and you will have children one day, and the Reaping is always greater than the Sowing.” I couldn’t comprehend at that time what she meant, but Bye and Bye, I truly understand everything she was trying to convey. God always send Warning Before Destruction, if we would only take heed. Be encouraged and God bless as you continue to write with the passion of your heart.

    Reply
  3. sissandra3

    I was raised in a very old school evironment. I asked why so much till they could look on my face and read my mind and before I could get it out somebody would holla,don’t even ask. My nickname was nosey rosey (4real) My parents had a habit of saying “I’ll tell you later” and unfortunately for me their later would always be to late. GOD is the only source that really can answer our questions regarding our past,present,and future and rightfully so. In prayer it is funny but I never speak to HIM with the nerve of questioning HIM. I respect HIS council and wisdom to much to even fix my lips to ask such an unmerrited question. However,sometimes I am guilty of talking to myself at which point I will holla to the top of my lungs asking me,myself,and I…WHY? and I do this not expecting a answer but as a sigh of either relief or acknowledgement of my submission to the process that I am in for that moment. Again lady Sara your posting reveals a level of insight for your age that amazes me it reveals a depth of love imparted to you that makes me wonder how other children of “Anointed” preachers/leaders could be anything other than awesomely blessed.

    Reply
  4. Abbigail

    Yet another great blog! It reminds me of the discipline I received as a child and the grace filled discipline as an adult.
    Thank you Sarah, for allowing God to use you to reassure me of his Grace!

    Reply
  5. Michele-Rene (@goldjasper)

    There are tears that flow in silence … and then there are those that fall with A Sound. Behind every LOL HAHAHA and tee-hee, is a -_-, but God never embarrasses me ` it is only now that HE Compels Me: He Said, its ok to speak. and tho there was a shadowy death valley i needed to cross, even to get here – right here – to the land of speaking – only speaking thru my heart’s mouth – i’m here ^In this land^ Only To Find More “Dusty”; Grrr! and I stood at the Banks…Looking, Wondering … and now I Believe, the dust I See Is Really Within Me. and then God sent a speaker, as He Said He Would – but younger – as He Said He Would. He Said The Youngers Would Prophecy and the Olders Would Dream Dreams. Only, I Am In betwixt/between Old and Young…. seemingly, understanding EveryThing Else, but this oneMOI! The Discipline of Rebellion – thats one thing i got right! LOL! i gotta laugh cause its too terrible` tome! and so, these soundproducing tears are seeming tobe the Much Needed Rain ForTo Bring The Earth Back To Life-Back/Together Again. For Dust We Are. We Are Earth. and as you profoundly reminded us Sarah, Even The Lovely Sun, Which I Love So Dearly- even this one Can Burn and Dry You Up To Wither … and so I WON’T COMPLAIN! Ive DECIDED TO EMBRACE THIS RAIN. I Decided To Face All Pains, Fears and UnSureties — I Know I Have To Go`JUST GO. Bound But I Have To Go – and i too am GrateFuL -Very- That There Was A Discipline From My HeavenFather – He Saved My Life- My Essence .. and THAT! Is ALLLTOBE THANKFUL FOR! Thank You Fathaaaa!!! There Is Still More Process … this we know … but, the most difficult door has been kicked in – busted down – WEdone thugged it ouTT!! -^_^- Enemy Mad … cause i started talkin … Thank You Sarah…You Don’t Even Know . . . and finally, about the “attachments” piece – never thought of the judgment part, but there still is yet much to decipher … i’ve got to store treasures in Heaven and build treasure on earth2. GOD’s Gonna Redeem The Time and Return To Me 1000x moreThan i gave to the Devil, he Took From Me, and the Cancor Worm and All His Nasty Little Cousins devoured! … i just feel now i need to give God SomeThing To Work With, So I Can Live Again … build a future here on this planet as I AM AMBASSADOR IN THIS LAND. cant be no broke ambassador! WHATsDAT???? HAHAHA!! BUT! BUTT! BUTTT!!! (*_-) REAL TRICKY!! Discernment – I Need To Know – Who Is It Sent? and By Whom? God/Enemy? oH I Know … i’m just walkin… lookin… watchin… Its A Lot Goin On … and i cant always tell THE REASON behind things…but I can feel things … and well, THE BLESSING IS, I Feel a Measure of Protection and Peace and New Hope … mostly bc oV your Family. You’ll Thick and Quick!! HAHAHA! EvryBody Witty! Funny! SPIRITUAL! REASONABLE! LOL! The Association Has Offered Me A Sense of ‘IT’S OK” I know that nobody, no thing is perfect … so when you see SomeThing Closer To It Than You Ever Seen Before … THAT’S PRETTY KEWL!! ^_^Thank You Sarah … WhenEver I Begin With YourWriting …The Rain From Within Falls Heavy With Sounds …but once the waterfalls fall … There is Left, only A Mist, A Pleasantness, and I’m Brighter Than I Was Before. GOTME! A!GAIN! ^_^ BLESS YOU 1000X MORE SARAH …. YOU and ALLL OV YOURS! IT IS SO! JESUS! Thank you! cyaLater2Day! Peace-peace.

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  6. Kwartema

    Amen Amen Amen ….this generation truly needs this message and I love that its coming from their peer a young woman who has learnt to appreciate the value of Grace filled discipline….

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  7. Joy Kay

    Thank you for this piece! I am grateful for my “foster parents” as well. My mom recently passed and although I am 49 years old, I am feeling, seeing, and experiencing the Father’s touch in a way that I never have before. He is there always as my mom always said. I didn’t think that I could survive with out her because we were so close, but the Lord has stepped into every area of my life in a way that I could not see before her death.

    I thank God for your transparency and your willingness to share.

    Reply
  8. pvarsenec

    Beautiful Sarah. I really identified with this. You are a natural born teacher. I always enjoy reading your blog. Thank you.

    Reply
  9. Kulani

    So God’s discipline is the message of this quarter been hearing the discipline teachings from august in church.God more of you in my life, be enthroned in everything I do.Thank you SarahD

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  10. Rayna Vee

    Thank you for your awesome istructions.. YOU are doing more than you think!! Your blogs are helping me become who God wants me to be.. The things you say are things that I may have heard but you say it in a way that I can truly understand and make me want to do better!! Thank you Lord for allowing a person that I don’t know to minister into my soul!!

    Reply
  11. Cherie Lea

    Wow! Every time I read what you have written I become even more inspired. These words are so true. My foster parents discipline me and my brothers too, and because they didn’t spare the rod and spoil the child, I didn’t stray to far from the Lord. Even before I truly gave God my life God still chastised me because the foundation was set in my life from an early age. But today I appreciate the chastisment even more, because it made me a better person who is strong in the Lord, and appreciating the sunshine and the rain because I know the Lord knows what’s best for me better than I know for myself. Thank you Lord for all you do and for raising me, and giving me parents who were after your heart and wanted us to know you for ourselves.

    Reply
  12. Damilola Afolabi

    “I’m grateful for this storm, even though I’m scared, even though the thunder is loud, and the wind is harsh….thank You for the rain that is reaching the deepest areas of my soul….I know that when the sun comes out I will be firmer, stronger than before.” – This captures my present situation and I know I’ll be better for it.
    God bless you Sarah.

    Reply
    • sandra freeman

      Yes, I agree with Damilola… this captures my current situation also…. I loved this post….. Keep them coming Sarah!! Peace and Blessings!

      Reply
    • seyidott

      Damilola, this was the bit that resonated the most with me. Infact as i was reading it was raining cats and dogs and i was lying there mumbling to God how scared i was about the storms of my life when the mail came in on my phone. God bless you Sarah, and help us through the storms we are facing.

      Reply
  13. Kaderick Jones

    You are such an anointed dynamic writer! “Foster Parents”? Really? I love the way you made that live and the illustration about being connected to siblings (people) is such a relevant issue that should be discussed more in depth on many platforms. Thank God for your gift!

    Reply
  14. Elizabeth

    Great post Sarah. However, i do feel that children should ask questions that’s how they learn. After always being told in school that no question is a stupid question, ask questions. I think it’s very important. I know in my case not having the liberty to ask made me inquistive to explore and then rebel because i wanted to know the other side of the fence. So telling your children not to do a thing and giving them the reason of why you’re telling them not to do it more than just i told you so is very important especially in this new generation of children coming up. They are smart, very smart. Not having children of my own but constantly being around them let’s me know that we’re going to have to change our approach of discipline or not changing it altogether but adding to it. Nonetheless, a great post, keep them coming!

    Reply
    • sarahdhenson

      Elizabeth,

      It was just an analogy for the post. I think people should raise their children however they see fit. So please don’t mind it :)

      Thanks,
      Sarah

      Reply
      • Annette

        I believe a question raised because of a need to learn can quickly the discerned from a question stemming from rebellion/questioning authority….. without being emotional, as a parent you should be able to discern the spirit behind the question and cut through it.

  15. pbus1

    Thank God, experience doesn’t always have to be the teacher! Why is it, that discipline is looked upon as a bad word? There is always a negative connotation attached to it. In many cases, nothing could be farther from the truth. Children and adults alike, actually thrive in disciplined environments. Where discipline is absent, chaos is present. Discipline is not always synonymous with punishment or chastisement. Discipline means order, training to improve strength, self-control, etc.

    “Foster Parents.” I loved that. I too thank God for my parents! I was also raised in a disciplined environment. Because of that, I am the person I am today! I am a child of the King! I love the Lord, with all my heart!

    I truly enjoyed your post. It was thoughtfully and beautifully written. May the Lord continue to use you to be a blessing to the body of Christ!

    Paulette

    Reply
  16. Stephanie

    Sarah, you have really inspired me with this blog, I watch your dad on the Potters House and I would see you come on from time to time and introduce your dad’s message and just took a liking to the way you spoke. You seem to have such a sweet spiirt, I was surprised to find out your life story, but you show how God can work in our lives and turn things around for His glory. Thank you for being such an inspiration.

    blessings, your sister in Christ.

    Reply

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