The older I get the more I realize life is never quite what it seems. There are times when life is as simple as enjoying the way sand feels in between my toes, smelling “cold” in the air during the holiday season, the feeling I get when I hear a song that captures my heart or the peace in seeing a rainbow after a violent storm. In these rare moments of ease we realize that life is as simple as living fully in each moment. Then there are times when you are introduced to the severe reality of life and the difficult decisions we all must make. There are some choices that will certainly change the outcome of our lives indefinitely so we choose to bear down and brace for the impact of life.

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There once was a family who spent night after night watching a family member lie still in a hospital bed while a machine gave their beloved’s chest a steady rhythm he was once capable of doing without its help. Each day the hospital staff would peek in on them, whispering outside the room about the war between life and death taking place inside those four walls. Faced with the choice of keeping hope alive or letting nature take its course, the family members spent day after day facing the complexities of life. Continue to watch the shell of who a person once was or allow their soul the freedom to transition to grace? Each option carrying undeniable pain…

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There are times in life when you have to make tough decisions, decisions where there will be no clear winners, it’s just life. As I continue to embrace fully who God has called me to be, I have been faced with such decisions. Should I hurt here or hurt there? Without a doubt either will bring pain but, it is the desire of my heart to only endure productive pain, to only sow tears that water the seeds of my destiny, and reveal the mystery of the potential that lies inside of me.

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Above all things, I hope to always choose me, I must be committed to remaining true to the person God has called me to be. We often sacrifice the beauty of who we are for the ugly insecurities of those who wish to stifle our potential. I cannot choose to live a life where everyone around me benefits from who I am but me. I want to be the first recipient of the blessing that is my life and allow that love to overflow to those who encounter the sweet aroma of my God given confidence. Simply put, there are times when I must break free and choose me.

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God give us peace in this hour of difficult decisions. May we find comfort in times of adversity and hope in our darkest hours. You have seen fit for us to carry the weight of these crosses so Lord help us believe in the strength You’ve entrusted to us. May the promise of our destiny, quiet the voice of fear that threatens to rob us of our hope. Clear our vision oh God, so that we may see sometimes the only way to break free is to choose me.

About The Author

Sarah Jakes

Sarah Jakes oversees the women's ministry at The Potter's House of Dallas, the church led by her parents, Bishop T.D. Jakes and Mrs. Serita Jakes. She regularly blogs at sarahjakes.com and occasionally serves as a TV host on The Potter's Touch.

79 Responses

  1. Dalya

    THIS>>>>>>>”Above all things, I hope to always choose me, I must be committed to remaining true to the person God has called me to be. We often sacrifice the beauty of who we are for the ugly insecurities of those who wish to stifle our potential. I cannot choose to live a life where everyone around me benefits from who I am but me. I want to be the first recipient of the blessing that is my life and allow that love to overflow to those who encounter the sweet aroma of my God given confidence. Simply put, there are times when I must break free and choose me”

    That gave me life after a long day of emotions all over the place. Thank you Sarah. This blog was ontime, literally lifechanging. Bless you!

    Reply
    • Lakisha Pegues

      Your message has inspired me. I believe “a move of God is on the way”! God bless you, and stay blessed!

      Reply
  2. Brittany Eady

    I love you & the wisdom that flows through blogs are always life changing!

    Reply
  3. Earica

    Thank you again for another amazing word – I so needed this & it confirms what I have been feeling lately! Its okay to Choose ME – make myself my #1 priority!! Keep allowing God to use you because your words are powerful and they are helping people like me to become better!!

    Reply
  4. wayne meadows

    Thanks Sarah for sharing your thoughts today, it brings to mind the challenges of our choices; even when they are overwhelming we can smile knowing that it’ll all work out.
    You know, it’s also so true that we need to put our own selves up front in our thinking …how else can we be our best for others when we aren’t doing that for ourselves?

    God really does love us enough to allow us to put ourselves first as long as it’snot in a selfish mindset!

    Be Blessed,
    Wayne

    Reply
  5. Vuyokazi

    Thank you Sarah for allowing God to use you to deliver a message to me that I so badly needed to hear. Through your message, God in heaven has spoken to me and aptly addressed my concerns that I did not want to share with anyone. Now I know what to do. Thank you.

    Reply
  6. Theresa Thomas

    You did it Again my beautiful daughter of the kingdom =}
    This is very true! I have had great loss in my life relationships, family… in fact, I loss at a young age all my immediately family except my younger sister, both brothers mom & dad are all passed! I was forced to learn this survival technique that has brought me through even today. It is vital to Separate yourself from environments and some people that hinder your progress to move forward…Keeping communication Not with people, who most times are seeking Entertainment at the expense of your circumstances or some simply want to feel better about there own lives…This is the time when we grow more intimate with our Savior =} Staying in God’s Word keeps FAITH STRONG and all negativity out and positive productivity in. When u realize who’s you are it’s not hard to know who is important!!! As always thanks for sharing =}

    Be Bless Sis!!!
    Theresa Thomas

    Reply
  7. Kim

    True words of wisdom. Such eye opening wisdom of truth. You are truly an inspiration. May God continue to use you as a His voice flowing the words of living water.

    Reply
  8. Gail

    AMEN young lady, AMEN. There’s nothing else to say. What you’ve said here is it in a nut shell. I totally agree with everything you’ve said.

    Reply
  9. folusho

    I will always choose me.I’m going thru a phase.This came at the right time.God bless u Sarah!

    Reply
  10. Prophetess Treva- Lyons-Kelly

    Sarah, your writings are all so inspirational. You are such such a lady in which your parents should be very proud!
    Pastor’s kids (pk) are always under the watchful eye… of our parent’s critics, haters and even our congregations.
    I’ve watched you grow into such a beautiful mother, wife, and God fearing young lady!
    Your writings exemplifies your wisdom beyond your years!
    Continue to “Live On Purpose” and may your light continue to shine ever so brightly. God has so MUCH in store for you…continue walking towards your inheritance!

    Reply
  11. Joi

    This was beautiful, and I thank God for using you to inspire and bless others. I needed a good word today

    Reply
  12. Mercy

    Sometimes “choosing me” means putting other people first before me and dying to self!

    Reply
  13. Sam

    Like you said pastor Sarah taking me the way Iam is a battle am asking God to help me deal with Paul the apostle in one his epistle said I can be speaking and I myself a castaway at end so I said to myself I can’t be helping people out the valley and I will remain in the valley God forbid. Thanks Sarah your making your daddy proud and the body of Christ I can’t forget your word. YOUR MESS CAN TURN TO BE YOUR MESSAGE. You are blessed great woman.

    Reply
  14. Dominique Doyle

    So beautiful……inspiring…..encouraging words……words of truth with amazing power!!!!

    Thank you for sharing

    Reply
  15. Pastor Bridget

    Another amazing blog!! Niece you possess the incredible skis to capture the readers heart. Love your style and commitment to chose you!!

    Many blessings!!

    Reply
  16. KimberlyRedd

    This was such an in season word for all of us facing the choice of choosing whoGod creted us to be & succumbing to who everyone else needs us to be. I have been on the verge of settling in a box that i was meant to live outside of. I’m am in awe of aGod who has considered my pain & led me to find his breath in these words that you have so eloquently shared. Thank you &PraiseHim

    Reply
  17. Adeniyi Oluwatosin

    I was richly blessed by this article, so blessed I sent it out as a broadcast on my BBm. I saw the link on twitter through Daddy’s handle,@BishopTDjakes (that’s what we all call him). Please keep up the good work and may God almighty continually strengthen your creativity, so you can continue to bless and uplift us.

    Reply
  18. Maria Briscese

    Beautifully written. Our choices have consequences. When those consequences go bad, we must embrace the forgiveness our Heavenly Father bestows on us & learn to forgive ourselves. I say this with conviction, but often struggle with the self forgiveness part. When choices I’ve made have hurt others, these are the ones that keep me up at night. I beg God for peace & knows that He forgives me. He is so much greater then I. I need the ability to forgive myself.

    Reply
  19. Andrell Walker

    These words have touched me because this is where I am now. Decision making is difficult but It has to be done. You must choose you & keep your focus on God. He will never leave you. Thank you for sharing your experience with us.

    Reply
  20. P. J. Joshua

    There are times when my yes could lead to pain and my no to freedom. There are times I could drop from the tough line and choose the easy way out. But now I know that behind the yes I failed to choose laid an eternal future of hope, peace, love and sccomplishment. Now I’m wiser.

    Reply
  21. Dipo Momodu

    it is the desire of my heart to only endure productive pain, to only sow tears that water the seeds of my destiny, and reveal the mystery of the potential that lies inside of me. Nice piece, thanks for making Bishop Jakes proud

    Reply
  22. khosi Nyawo

    Thanks for d inspiring message and encouraging words! Its d kind of words dat come in your crucial hour to dispel all hopelessness and discouragement that come from those who should be walking with you.

    Reply
  23. unyime

    I am truly inspired by your write up. It really is timely. May I never forfeit my dream to please the ‘nae’ sayers, I receive the grace to be all I ought to be. Thank you.

    Reply
  24. Silindile Zibane

    I am so blessed by this pieace. I write too, but have not written much lately. Reading your piece reminded me of the liberty I get deep inside me when I write from the bottom of my heart. Not carrying too much about what the reader is going to think of me. That is when the true me comes out. The woman God made me to be. God Bless you for encouraging me to choose me!

    Reply
  25. Oscar Garcia

    I could almost hear your voice as I read. Even if we’ve never met. Amazing writting, all the best and may God bless you.

    Reply
  26. Joewona Randolph

    amen and thank you ! That was truly a healing message for me ! I have to move forward! I love god and your family! Heart is overwhelmed with joy! Thank you Sarah!

    Reply
  27. Nontokozo

    Going throug my tweets and i found your blog link. Very beautiful how Gods love makes our soul sings and your words are an expression of that.

    Very very inspiring.

    God keep you and continue to bless you:)

    Reply
  28. Carol

    Sarah, thank you for this confirming word today. I find myself having to Choose Me in spite of what those closest to me think. I want serve God fully no matter the cost. I pray God will continue to bless you.

    Reply
  29. Christene

    Beautiful. I often struggle to “choose me” at times because I’m too blind to see what others see in me. But just as you mentioned we simply have to stop messing things up and let God manifest through His creation. Thank You for sharing your heart. May our God Bless You ten times more and may your true calling bless others the way You blessed me today. Keep pressing on. Let’s Go!!!

    Reply
  30. Iva

    Your words are very encouraging. You are the voice for many that hurt and can’t explain why. Your dad is an inspiration to billions and I encourage you my sister to carry the tourch.
    May God bless you.

    Reply
  31. Denise L. Bullock

    Ms.Sarah Denson,Your expressions were very well written,therefore showing the very truth to what you have experienced in life thus far.Mauturity has it’s place in our lives,it’s when we begin to acknowlege and be aware that we will continue to grow. Thankyou

    Reply
  32. meka

    Wow….this was destined for me to c this morning . I have been faced with some difficult decisions and the hardest part is breaking free from the opinion of ppl . Im am going to venture out and do what i feel God has called me too.

    Reply
  33. Kristen E. Graves

    Wow! This was so eloquently written and definitely written with passion. “May the promise of our destiny, quiet the voice of fear that threatens to rob us of hope.”
    This statement caused me to pray in like manner. Love this writing and I pray that your storm will increase the greatness that resides in you!

    Reply
  34. Colleen

    This definitely spoke to me. “I cannot choose to live a life where everyone around me benefits from who I am but me”God said he will pour us out a blessing we will not have room enough to receive. The overflow is what we bless others with. I ℓ♥√ع to help other but I forget to help myself. Thanks for this word.

    Reply
  35. Champagne Hills

    This piece touches my heart on many levels. I am at a place in my life where this walk is calling me to make some decisions that are so hard. I know that if I don’t find the strength somewhere I may be pushed out of position for not just my blessings but to hear my Lord say well done at the end of it all. I needed encouragement and prayed for guidance and this just opened up my eyes to so much. Thank you!!!

    Reply
  36. Itumeleng

    Wow beautiful! Thank you. It’s amazing how I can see the depths from where your words are coming from, I guess because much of what u wrote put into words much of what is going on inside of me.

    Reply
  37. ElderMW

    Beautiful!!

    Father thank you that because you have chosen us…we can choose ourselves.

    Reply
  38. Lakisha Pegues

    Ms Sarah, thank you so much for that inspiring word. Your message has touched me, and I am so blessed to have read it. Your family is anointed and appointed by God, and I consider it an honor to have this internet connection between you, and your family, on twitter and facebook. It’s amazing how many lives your family has touched and inspired to move forward! God sent your family here for this season. I’ve been going through some things, but I still have trust in God, and if I didn’t have good teaching and a “word” foundation, and encouragement like this, then I would’ve given up a long time ago. But I know “a Move of God is on it’s Way”! God bless you, and stay blessed!

    Reply
  39. Debra

    Sage starts as Seed.
    What a contrast, metaphorically speaking, Sage … Old Wisdom starts young.
    Your insight is truly an utterance of God’s desire for our very best. Simply Awesome, Young Lady.
    Keep sowing your Sage Seeds … Your words are a balm.
    The Apple didn’t fall far from the Tree :-)!

    Reply
  40. ballin laubakta

    If we could just but listen, God has a word for every situation we’re in.I’m in d midst of “makin some some tough decitions” in my life n I know God is clearly leading me, its tough but am confident cos I got his backing. Sothererefore I’m not gona shake cos no matter what, I know dat he won’t let me fall! God bless Ɣøû Sarah!

    Reply
  41. carmita vedol

    So grateful for the inspiring words to choose me that allows me to push forward toward my destiny. I’m very excited to begin my journey that embraces me to become the person God created for me to be. I’m ready and honestly anxious and little scared but i’m going to roll with the punches of the world and trust God! Glad to have you here to inspire me because often i find myself inspiring others and @ times i need that break to get my inspiring wishes from others. So thanks amillion Sarah!

    B~DESTINY

    Reply
  42. Robert Guy Dyson

    Your dad is right Sarah, you do write beautifully. This was a blessing to read. Too often we forget to enjoy God’s blessings as He intended and we bless others with them. Stop and smell the roses. but take time to enjoy the God given fragrance. God bless…and keep writing.

    Reply
  43. Mary Burroughs

    I truely enjoyed, your writing…You are, truely gifted,
    as a writer…God Bless….Mary

    Reply
  44. milti

    ‘…It is the desire of my heart to only endure productive pain, to only sow tears that water the seeds of my destiny…’ <—-everything, even the worst of situations, must be working out for my good!

    Reply
  45. Samantha Neville

    This is where I am. I felt I didn’t have the ability to break free, so I stayed in my corner, boxed off like a little child, which lead me to make some horrible decisions, in hopes that I would been seen, heard, valued. That didn’t happen…. and I’m still sitting in the corner like some scared little girl. Thank you this… this gives me hope, and courage.

    Reply
  46. LaShawn

    This is EXACTLY what I needed this morning! It speaks directly to my spirit. I thank you for being a willing vessel for God to use to send a word to His people.

    Reply
  47. Pst. Sheila Ashley

    Blessings, I didn’t have any other way to contact you, but I want you to know that Abba has had you on my heart for the last week or so, and I am praying for you tonight and that whatever storm you are weathering Abba is piloting the coarse…I am sorry for posting on your blog, but I couldn’t sleep for thinking about you and I NEEDED you to know that someone outside of your family, friends and church family is holding you up before Abba.

    This is not a PREY-HUNT but a PRAYER-NOTIFICATION!

    Agape, Peace and Joy,

    Pst. Sheila L. Ashley

    Reply
  48. Hazel Jackman

    Thanks for sharing Sarah. I am at the crossroads right now, pondering things, searching for answers. Your article is inspiring. I see the light. God bless.

    Reply
  49. Christine

    Sarah – your naked honesty in your journey is such a safe place for many to land in the face of harsh realities. Pray you continue in His strength and comfort. Your purpose is being unveiled even in the harshest of seasons. Thank you for sharing!!
    Chris (Gll grad 2012) :)

    Reply
  50. Tanya

    I want to let you know that your words are so inspirational as well as encouraging. Your father has always deliever a message that has supported me throughout my life that helps me walk my christian walk. But you have given me some words from women that i will keep close to my heart. Keep allowing god to use you.

    Reply
  51. Marcia

    The statement about how you only desire to have “productive pain” was an “ah ha” moment for me. That is so true and well put. Although it was another blog article, let me say that being transparent is the revelation I recently received and came to the conclusion that it would be the best course in my position in my church ministry. Reading your thoughts on transparency was confirmation for me because I believe/realized for me to reach women, the way I would like, I have to be 100% with my story in order for them to understand where God has truly brought/bringing me from.

    Reply
  52. Nykyta

    You are such an awsome young lady in christ, the words that flashed through my mind to say was your everything i hope to be but there will never be another you. Its my time to find and see what God gave me for his glory.
    Facing many struggles and challanges some overcome. Your blogs have shon a light in to my circumstances into my heart. I truly thank you.
    As im 19 year old single mother of 2 you are such an insporing example to me of what God can do how he can use me and you i now know everything i face good or bad its a testimony i do not have the right to hold back from others i want others to know just as you`ve shown me if he can do it for me he`ll do it for you too.
    Your blogs have pushed me to testify to love, to laugh to live.given me a hope i thought i could never find. It shows me us the outcome of always remaining true to yourself and others to.never give.up hope no matter how it gets to keep believing to live to laugh hope and continue to dream. So thank you sarah!
    I hope this shows you once again what a blessing ou are to others.
    Never be ashamed of who you are.
    Keep me in your prayers and i will keep you in mine.
    God bless
    Xxx

    Reply
  53. Ruby

    Sarah,

    Your words have touched the lives of so many teen, young adult, middle aged, and elder ladies who have yet to express what they feel deep down on the inside.

    Because of what most have experienced in their past, satan has put a strong hold so one would feel as if they couldn’t be released from the bondage of guilt and shame, to be healed, set free, and delivered. I stand in the gap for ladies of all ages and ethnicities to say that grip is broken! We will no longer walk and live in shame as if we’ve been cast into a cacoon never to break forth as the beautiful butterfly that God has called us to be.

    Through all the hurt, pain, turmoil, being ridiculed, talked about, mistreated; God has allowed you to be a beacon of light for each and every girl to take a glimpse way deep down on the inside and release the potential that God has blessed us with.

    “It’s In You”

    Your words carry so much inspiration, and for that I am grateful.

    There once was a time when I didn’t feel loved or appreciated, but as I grew to maturity in Christ, I began to realize there was purpose in all I experiened and God had a plan for lil ol me ;)

    At the age of 13 I had my first encounter with the Holy Spirit and I would never be the same. TO GOD IS THE GLORY FOR THE GREAT AND MARVELOUS THINGS HE HAS DONE!

    (Psalms 24:6-10)
    “This is the generation of them that seek him, that seek thy face, O Jacob. Selah.
    Lift up your heads, O ye gates; and be ye lifted up, ye everlasting doors; and the King of glory shall come in.Who is this King of glory? The Lord strong and mighty, the Lord mighty in battle.Lift up your heads, O ye gates; even lift them up, ye everlasting doors; and the King of glory shall come in.Who is this King of glory? The Lord of hosts, he is the King of glory-Selah.”

    Reply
  54. chandra

    I AM A SINGLE PARENT OF TWO.MY CHILDREN ARE GROWN NOW.I WISH I HAD THE WISDOM TO LEAVE.OUT OF MY 20 YEAR RELATIONSHIP.THE GUY I WAS DATING WAS CHEATING ON ME BUT I ENDED THE RELATIONSHIP.I FOUND MYSELF.THAT I WAS IMPORTANT TO ENFACT WE ALL ARE.LOVE YOU TAKE CARE OF YOUR SELF.

    Reply
  55. Cheri

    Thank you for this post Sarah;
    it touches my heart as i am getting ready to send my 4year old to my sister and her husband to help take care of her since i am a single full time working mother and she has special needs. For 4yrs i cant count the number of times i have been to doctors and hospitals coping with my daughter’s epilepsy, leading to developmental delay, no speech and diagnosed with autsim. Most times i feel like i am neglecting my daughter because i do not have enough time to help her develep, we are always on the go. I long to hear her speak but i thank God a delay is never a denial. I truly also thank God for keeping the both of us strong in this process and for sending angels our way to help. I wouldnt trade anything for the gift that God gave me in my daughter and reading this really helps me keep strong. I pray to God that while my daughter’s gone she gets better in a new enviroment also i can get myself together and when she comes back i will have more time with her .

    God bless you for this message, right on time.

    Reply

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